Well, we finally got our website back up!
With humble apologies to C.S. Lewis fans everywhere, I am beginning to suspect that somewhere in eons past, there was a nefarious meeting that took place in the depths of Hell.
The conversation would have gone something like this:
“Our enemy wants to communicate his message of Love to all the world. He wants people everywhere to share his ‘Good News’ with each other. What shall we do to frustrate his plans?”
“I know!” said one enterprising young demon enthusiastically.
“He wants people to communicate. We’ll give them communication technology!”
An atmosphere of hushed awe fill the caverns with a new depth of wicked despair. “Go on!” said Satan, eagerly anticipating the unfolding of this diabolical plot about to be unleashed on an unsuspecting humanit.
The demon proceeded with the passion that only pure evil can produce.
“Instead of genuine connection with each other, we’ll create a huge network of interconnection between their tools, like a huge spider web. In fact, that might even be a good name for it!”
Not to be outdone, another demon jumped up eagerly. “Instead of conversation, we can give them something like ‘Unlimited Text’! Instead of actually being together, they can send each other pictures, maybe even make them moving pictures, so that they are like real life!”
By now, the pair were dancing in sheer obscene ecstasy at the thought. “Oh, ooh, oh! … Oh, the brilliance of it! … Instead of the pleasure and fulfillment of face-to-face friendship, we take all those little pictures of people they know and love, and we put them all together in a sort of book … like a big book of faces … and people will start saying, “Look at how many friends I have!” … about people they don’t even know!”
“We’ll take the Lamb’s Book of Life, and turn it into some kind of Book … of something! We’ve got to come up with a good name for it! Maybe we can start with Lust, and get him to help us make like a black book of names and faces of girls in college. Then, we give the idea to some college guy, and let him promote it. Not real relationships … Fake Ones! I know … FakeBook! … No, that’s not it! But we’re so close … I can feel it!”
At this point, Mammon got really interested. “Wait a minute! Any possibility of developing greed, corruption, crass materialism and consumerism with this thing? I mean, could we make the kid rich or something?”
“Of course!” the pair replied in unison. “The possibilities are infinite! You could start by selling advertising. We’ve been looking to put some fresh fire into that anyway. Madison Avenue and Hollywood just aren’t doing quite the job they used to! Besides, we can kept them to do things in the privacy of their homes that you’d never get away with in public!”
Satan was pleased!
Mammon gave the two a promotion. All the political positions were taken, so they were made heads of Real Estate Investing, and Financial Lending respectively. Together they pioneered a financial instrument called ‘the Death Grip’ (or, in Latin, ‘Mort Gage’).
Centuries later, in Heaven, the Ministry of Open Source Development was completely overwhelmed. “Look, in theory … WordPress was a really good idea! However, you know that thing you wrote, ‘I pray you all be of the same mind, and speak the same thing’ … that whole unity and body-working-together thing?”
“Y-e-e-aah … well … they just don’t get it!”
And so, here we are. The website is finally up, but I can’t help feeling that somewhere in the spiritual realms, I get the dark echoes of cackling laughter at my feeble efforts.
Still, we’re trusting that God will bless and multiply our work as he always does.
And for that, he gets the glory, and the enemy is rebuked!